Help! I Feel Pushy And I Hate It!

Hands up if the idea of marketing, or selling, or asking for business or (worst of all!) asking for money makes you feel pushy?

Pushy is that horrible feeling that you’re being judged as ‘too big for your boots’ or people are wondering ‘who do you think you are?’ or any of the other imposter mind monkeys that come creeping – and in some cases rushing – at you.

These mind monkeys start from the tiny cappuccino monkey that is a ‘gosh, that’s a bit squirmy’ thought as you do something that’s a tiptoe outside your comfort zone. They grow, through chimpanzees to the full-blown silver-back gorilla that’s on it’s back legs and bellowing. You know the difference in how they feel without my articulating it, right?

Guess what? They’re all wrong.

Mind Monkeys Aren’t Real

The thing about pushy mind monkeys is that they’re not real. The feelings that they induce are absolutely real, but they themselves are not.

Mind monkeys are thoughts. And just because you think something, doesn’t make it true.

Thinking that people will judge you, doesn’t mean that they are. In fact, rather disappointingly, they’re almost certainly not judging you, because they’re almost certainly not thinking about you at all!

Make A Choice

You have a choice; you can either hold yourself back, with thoughts of being pushy and of being judged, or you can accept that a) most people are actually thinking about themselves and not you and b) what others think about you is none of your business.

Which would you rather have, no thoughts and associated feelings of being pushy, or no clients? It really is that simple.

The successful coach chooses to get out there, with the right message in the right place. The agonised coach, paralysed by the thoughts they’ve chosen to accept as true, does not.

Would you like to talk? This is my diary.